Ze French Like Bores? Doubtful

During an unsettling moment I deleted a lot of posts here, most of them related to his fanboys and their immense stupidity. A couple I deleted were related to interviews he did. This post will cover one of them. An interview with a French gaming website.

http://www.p-nintendo.com/articles/I-143-1.html

There are three other notable interviews, the one on his DVD, the one with a Sandusky newspaper (his home town) and the infamous Uncensored Net Noise interview.

Special thanks to Glowsquid at TVTropes for translating. He notes the wording was weird and stilted, likely due to a bad English-to-French translation.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=rqpkxkiwzjpf09gyoz5bicba&page=9#201

For context, this interview came out November 18th 2009. His most recent video was the one about Yummy Mummy.

Before making the review, is it easy to guess if the game is bad or not?
Well, I let the review speak for itself. And it is not because I review a game that it is necessarily bad. I try to find games that have easy flaws and incapacities to make fun of.

By easy flaws, he means unable to beat it without Game Genie. Also, your reviews are poorly-worded and vague, telling us nothing about the game. So how does it “speak for itself”?

What are your criterias to say if a game is bad or not?
Let's say I generally choose games based on a specific theme or a series of jokes I had in mind. But the bad games are generally based on the bad impression the public had when discovering them.

You heard that right folks, Bores doesn’t actually choose games to play. He thinks of jokes he saw on TV and picks a game in order to tell them. With that attitude he could be a rejected Jay Leno writer! Play the game then write the jokes. Crap like your Tetris video wasn’t funny.
I’m sure people had a bad impression of Aladdin, Cool Spot, Ghosts N Goblins, Contra, Super Mario Bros. 2, and Tetris. Oh wait no, they loved those games!

Do the Wii possess the biggest number of bad games you've ever seen, or how is it possible to find more on other consoles?
I think all consoles have their bad games and the rare jewels. I didn't find many [games] on Wii that I needed to get but that's just my opinion.

No shit, all consoles have bad games and underrated games. That’s common knowledge. To the interviewer, what the hell kind of question is that? Maybe it’s a mistranslation.

What is the worst game you've ever reviewed?
That's an hard question to answer. I've played many bad games. Most on the NES and on Atari's console. Those are the one I criticized the most for their lazy cash-in nature. And I can't remember the name of these games because there isn't an aspect that deserves to be remembered.

You liar! You’ve played far more good games than bad. Most of the games you call “bad” are actually decent or even classics.
On Atari’s console? They’ve made more than one. Are you forgetting the 5200, 7800, Lynx, and Jaguar? Even so, that’s also a lie. You’ve only reviewed TWO games on the 2600, E.T. and Kool-Aid Man.
You can’t remember any of the games you reviewed? Thanks for telling us exactly how much you care about this show.
By the way, criticizing something for being a lazy cash-in? Tasty hypocrisy.

Do you receive mails from publishers complaining about your opinion?
I've talked with WWE guys over my review of 2008 Smackdown vs. Raw, but that's it. However, I get a lot of mails from famous magazine's reviewers, as well as other Youtube celebrities from time to time. A few will appear in the next episode of The Irate Gamer Show.

By WWE guys you mean their lawyers because you used their footage right? Be specific, who from the WWE did you talk to? Wrestlers, managers, higher-ups?
Which magazine reviewers? Give us names! When you just say “oh this famous person from a magazine contacted me, no I won’t say who” it sounds like you’re lying. Wouldn’t be the first time…
Which YouTube celebrities? It’s been almost a year since you said this and the only other person you’ve included in a video was Wise Sage and he didn’t even get a line (Bores probably knows people like Wise Sage more than him). I do remember BigAl2k6 saying he did some footage for him but it wasn’t used. BigAl is no longer a YouTube “celebrity” he uses Blip now, he wasn’t even that big to begin with.

Do you play good games from time to time?
Not as much as some would think. I don't have a lot of free time playing video games because of my insane schedule doing three shows on Youtube. I also have my own production company that take care of projects for people around my community. But I love playing with my old Gameboy games, I spent a lot of my childhood playing them.

Three shows? All you do is Irate Gamer you don’t have three shows. No, I don’t count IG Neo as a different show it’s the same thing but shorter.
Also, all you do is play good games. You just bash them in order to keep up the “irate persona” that you stole.

Which?
Well, this week I tried to beat Super Mario Land 2. I've also just beat Contra IV, so I'm taking a break.

Contra 4 isn’t a Game Boy game. You should know this, you briefly talked about it! What do you mean by “taking a break”?

What is your favorite game?
I love the classics like Kirby, Mario World, Zelda 3, Contra. It's a really sweet job.

I’ve never heard of a game called Kirby. I’ve heard of Kirby’s Dream Land, Kirby Super Star, and Kirby’s Epic Yarn but never one called Kirby.
I’ve also never heard of Zelda 3. Is that hard to call it Link to the Past?
*looks at last line* What’s with this non-sequitur at the end?
I like Okami, Red Dead Redemption, and Chrono Trigger. Inertia is a property of matter.

Are you more forgiving of the flaws in older games, compared to more recent games?
Oh yeah. Let's say that the show try to exploit the weaknesses of all the games I've played at least 10 times.

No you’re not! You complain when the graphics in NES games aren’t FMV with MP3 sound. You rarely give complaints in your Neo reviews, and when you do it’s a non-existent complaint you thought of to sound angry (I still don’t understand his problem with the sound in Brutal Legend).
Oh, and you actually have a quota to your whining? You aren’t satisfied unless you can find 10 things wrong with a game? That doesn’t make sense!

When did you begin the reviews and how did you get the idea?
Well, I wrote a script at the end of 2006 but I tinkered around for a few months before filing a few outdoor scenes in 2007. I made this show primarily to entertain peoples.

Pfft, yeah entertain people. More like entertain your wallet.

How much time do you need to make a video?
The production currently takes much more time than when I started out. I used to make my reviews really quick but now it takes one or two months to make a review. I think the final result shows the time and efforts spend.

“See, I need to stuff in all the effects I can. That way people won’t notice my atrocious writing and acting.” The effort is never shown, it always looks like you slapped it together in an hour even when you actually put effort in.

Do you receive many suggestions for games to review in future episodes?
Oh yes. Practically every day. At home, I have a notebook with a long list of games I want to get for future episodes and many fan suggestions are on it.

“Sometimes I’ll just talk about an unrelated game for 30 seconds and I’ll count that as a full review.”

Any last word for your Francophone fans?
You guys rocks, thank you very much! (said in French in the text, apparently)

Feh, like you have fans. What a dumb interview.

I think the only way Bores can do an interview now is to clarify if the person has ever heard of the AVGN. Otherwise, that question WILL be asked and he’ll make himself look like a fool, stuttering as he finds excuses.

By the way, I saw a video from TheArchfiend talking about one of his old live shows where he debunks one of IG’s news posts, mentioning the blurb about the second DVD. Then I wondered “has he given an update about that since then?” I checked his website and the last time he mentioned actually working on it was April 2009. Followed by a brief mention in October 2009 when he released the remastered Zombies Ate My Neighbors video, saying “it‘s a long way‘s off“. I’m going to assume it’s never coming out. Honestly, after the first one bombed hard, he has no incentive to release a second one.

Until next time.

UPDATE!
Isn't he adorable?
And he set it to private! What a shock.