Irate Game Rsucks

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Friday, 20 November 2009

DJ Hero? Oh please nobody bought that.

Posted on 12:22 by Unknown

Disclaimer: This is at GottGame right now.


Wow Chris, another review already? It only took 3 weeks this time.

It’s DJ Hero, another quick cashgrab from the demons at Activision. Luckily the game sold poorly, but that doesn’t stop Bores from being an ignorant jackass.


Intro: He finally removed the Mario 2 footage from the theme. Maybe he reads this? Naaaah.

0:22: Pointless Happy Days reference with the DJ Hero controller. This is going to suck.


0:25 – 0:37: Bores points out the multiple “Hero” games Activision released in the last two months. He doesn’t seem to be bothered by this, I guess sell-outs appreciate the works of other whores.

He also calls Band Hero “Guitar Hero: Band Hero.” YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG! It’s not Batman: The Dark Knight, it’s not The Watchmen, it’s not Sonic Unleashed: The Hedgehog and Band Hero does not have the Guitar Hero moniker. That’s just stupid.


0:39: “They even created a new Guitar Hero accessory, the turntable.” That’s not a guitar you moron.


0:45 – 1:00: He explains that the game is just like GH only with record scratches and switches. Of course it’s much more complicated then that. He also points out the turntable works if you’re left-handed, and the point of mentioning this was?


1:17 – 1:26: Here he says he won’t bore us with the details (how thoughtful) but if you’ve played previous GH games then it should be easy. Really, because I played the Rock Band drums after mastering Guitar Hero on Expert. It doesn’t work like that.

I should point out he’s wearing a Pac-Man T-Shirt with a red jacket and headphones, Chris people aren’t stupid enough to think you’re a real DJ.


1:27 – 1:35: “Everything is customizable, you can unlock new venues, new characters…” Just like every other Guitar Hero/Rock Band game released in the last couple years.


1:36 – 1:41: “… and they added some nice eye candy, thank god for that.” Hey Chris, how is that break-up going? Also there’s a little invention called “The Internet” and there are many sites with “Eye Candy” available for free.


1:41 – 1:54: IG points out the ability to play guitar in some songs (notice how the guitar section is set to auto-play) but is pissed at the lack of drum support. It’s DJ Hero be glad you even got a guitar option. In fact that’s only available in ten remixes out of 94.


1:55 – 2:18: Here he whines that there are too many obscure songs that don’t get him moving. So when he gets a well-known song he does a little “spin” pretending he’s a DJ. Pointless.


2:18: “Another complaint I have is the game’s difficulty level” Here we go, let’s hear your bitching you twat.


2:22 – 2:40: His complaint here is that the difficulty is unbalanced (on the medium setting… okay) and how he can get 4-5 stars on some songs but some he can’t even get 2. Well that’s common in a lot of rhythm games. Where have you been?


2:40: *sighs* What follows could compete with “Call 911 I was ROBbed” for worst joke he’s ever told.

“I should be able to score more then 2 stars on Hollaback Girl. Damn, B-A-N-A-ass”

It hurts my soul so much.


The review ends saying the game isn’t for everyone but people that liked Guitar Hero will like this (no they won’t) and to be wary of the price tag.


And then… this “That’s pretty much it, Gamer Out” and the words “Irate Shady” with Eminem playing in the background. Never say Gamer Out again, and you’ll never be in the same league as Marshall Mathers.


Another video and surprise it’s another piece of crap. All I know is these Neo reviews provide more material for the parody creators and more fuel for his haters.


Now to wait for an actual review with poorly-acted sketches and overuse of Game Genie, I honestly can’t wait.

Stay Brutal my Readers.

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